Insightful Mornings with Shelby: Navigating The Morning Routine | Episode #17
Episode 17
Insightful Mornings with Shelby: Navigating The Morning Routine
Listen to this empowering and eye-opening episode that invites listeners into the extraordinary world of Shelby, a resilient and inspiring young woman who was born blind. Throughout this episode, Shelby explores the many aspects of her morning routine, shedding light on how she navigates her world. From waking up and orienting herself to the day ahead to choosing outfits, preparing meals, and getting ready for work or school, this episode delves into the practical, emotional, and creative aspects of Shelby's mornings.
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0:00:06.8 Dr. Droste: We would like to welcome the world to our Through Our Eyes podcast brought to you by the Pediatric Retinal Research Foundation. We're a community of visually impaired young adults talking about what it's like to navigate through high school, through college, through career development, and beyond.
0:00:27.1 Nicole Gudicci: So the question was, how do you get ready in the morning with regards to matching your clothes and picking out outfits?
0:00:35.0 Shelby: I'm gonna be perfectly honest with you. I'm not gonna sugarcoat anything. The answer right now is, I don't. [laughter] I honestly don't pick out my clothes every day just because I have so many clothes, and my closet is not really in a user-friendly sort of state at the moment. We want to make it that way when I get to wherever it is I'm going and I get my own place. But right now, I'm just... We're kind of at a loss as to how to organize my clothes, because at first we started out by using these tactile tags, and it just got to the... For a while, it worked great because we would actually have to take these plastic pins that had different dots on them, and I had to make some sort of code where different dots corresponded to their matches. So if the dots were on this side of the tag, then that means that it would match up with whatever this was. And it was just a pain. And then we tried coming up with a list of different colors that would go together, and obviously, there are so many different shades of colors that just didn't work too well.
0:01:55.3 Shelby: So we're kind of at a loss as to how to organize clothing. If we did that same system again, obviously the whole code would have to be redone simply because clothes get shuffled and the tags go missing and that sort of thing. I'm hoping that in the future I can get one of these devices. It's called an OrCam, and supposedly you can actually look at the clothing and it will tell you what color it is, what it goes with, that sort of thing. So that's basically the not-so-satisfactory short answer. We really don't know how we're gonna [chuckle] organize my clothes in the future and figure out which ones [chuckle] match up with which things.
0:02:42.8 NG: So dovetailing on that, Shelby, how's laundry day go? It's probably difficult to separate clothes into darks, lights, and whites.
0:02:53.2 Shelby: Well, not really just because with heavier clothing, jeans and that sort of thing, pants, those tend to be darker colors. Shirts and undergarments and socks, those would probably be in the lighter category. So that's how I sort the darks from the lights. I actually have a laundry bag that has two different compartments. So I will put the lights in one side and the darks in the other side, and then I'll just run two loads or more as needed. I actually had to have all of the knobs and buttons on the washer and the dryer marked with braille. You don't have to do it that way. You can always use tactile dial, tactile markings, to indicate which settings the dials would be on. If it's a difference between choosing light or medium or large loads, then you could just have three tactile markings surrounding the knob.
0:03:57.1 Shelby: A lot of times if you can remember which orientations correspond to which settings, you could do it that way. Actually, I remember when I was in college and we actually put braille on the washer and the dryers. We would mark each thing so that I would... Actually, wait a minute. I don't think we did, actually. Because I remember in the dorms, there were three different buttons on it, and the choices were kind of limited. So once I figured out which buttons did which things, it was just a matter of pressing the right one.
0:04:32.3 NG: That's pretty awesome. That helps with your independence.
0:04:35.2 Shelby: Definitely, yes.
0:04:37.2 NG: So tell me now, 'cause I'm curious, how do things go with doing your hair and makeup?
0:04:44.2 Shelby: Honestly, I don't do makeup. And this is the thing, though. This is kind of... My mom and I have kind of bashed heads on this occasionally, but she... The thing is, I don't like wearing makeup because it makes me feel kind of artificial. I feel like a Barbie doll whenever I put on [laughter] makeup. I do wear some types of jewelry, though. My mom is insistent that I wear one pair of earrings, that I wear a pair of earrings, and usually I'll have my cross on or one of my other necklaces. I like to wear a lot of symbolic jewelry, so I like to wear the cross because I'm a Christian, and sometimes I'll wear a peace symbol or that sort of thing. But I really don't trouble myself with makeup.
0:05:38.1 Shelby: As far as doing my hair is concerned, we've tried to do it several different ways. Bang, it was apparent that bangs would not really be the best thing [chuckle] at all because it's so hard to take care of. But I tend to just wear my hair in a single part down my back. And sometimes if I don't want it in my face or if I just want it to be pulled back, I can just pull it back into a ponytail. Sometimes my mom braids my hair but not very often, just because it's not something that... I just don't like to spend much time on it. I'm one of those people who just like, "I wanna get this done," so I can move on and then... [chuckle] Obviously I wanna look nice, but it's not something I'd like to spend hours and hours on. So, yeah.
0:06:34.2 NG: While we're on the theme of getting ready and progressing through your day, when it comes to breakfast, for example, do you tend to have the same breakfast on a daily basis, just for ease of...
0:06:48.2 Shelby: Sometimes I do, but it's not because I wanna be lazy or I just... It's mostly because of that's what I feel like eating. But it's not for the sake of ease because I have several different options that I can choose from. Actually, one of the pieces of technology that I'm fortunate enough to have is... It's a barcode scanner. And they don't make these anymore, which I'm really, really sad about, but I have an ID Mate Quest. If you're familiar with the ID Mate Galaxy, this was the model that was came out before then. Unfortunately, like I said, the company, they don't make them anymore, which is really sad 'cause they ran out of parts, but it's very cool because you can take any product that you want from the fridge, freezer, pantry, whatever, and you can scan it.
0:07:40.8 Shelby: So when I get where I'm going, I might organize my pantry in such a way that different foods are in different places. For example, all the breakfast stuff might be on the right and all the canned goods and staples may be on the left, that sort of thing, just as a generic example. Obviously, it's gonna be a lot different here because I'm not living on my own, and things tend to get shuffled around and it's kind of just stick something in wherever it'll fit. So it's easy for things to get shuffled around, but it's obviously gonna be much different when I move in and get a place of my own and I can get a little bit more organized.
0:08:30.4 NG: When it comes to just getting ready for the day, what's the biggest challenge you face every day?
0:08:37.0 Shelby: Probably going back to the whole clothing-matching sequence. [laughter] That's definitely a challenge, especially... I mean, don't get me wrong. I love my grandmother dearly, but she and my mom tend to buy different types of clothing that's the exact same thing but it's a different color. And I actually have a friend who tends to wear nothing but jeans and T-shirts just because everything matches everything else. But obviously, depending on the occasion that I'm dressing for and the weather and certain other factors, it's gonna be very different. Sometimes you have to look nicer than other times. Especially when it comes to job interviews, you definitely want to dress to impress, because unfortunately we do live in a sighted world. And as much as I complain about trying on different clothing items, I feel like a lot of times it's going to feel like...
0:09:38.3 Shelby: A lot of the battles that I get into with my mom over clothing and looks and all that stuff, a lot of times it's not me versus her because I know she wants the best for me. It's more like me versus the rest of society, 'cause we do live in a sighted world, and unfortunately you have about five seconds to make a good impression when people look at you. So it is very unfortunate that the first thing that they happen to land on is a person's appearance, but it's just the way it is and I sort of have to just accept it and grin my teeth and bear it. So it's definitely a challenge.
0:10:24.7 NG: Well, thank you for sharing all of this with us. I feel like we've got a day in your life, at least up until the start of the day.
[laughter]
0:10:33.8 NG: I think we can cut that one there. How's that for a short one?
0:10:36.9 DD: Good.
0:10:38.4 Luisa Recchia: Yep. That was good. That was good. I was gonna ask Shelby, if there was something that existed to help with clothing, what would it be or look like?
0:10:52.2 Shelby: In a perfect world, it would be our eyes, but the next best thing would probably be a device that can tell you not only what shades of... That's the thing. There are literally hundreds of apps and devices out there that can tell you what color something is, but what it doesn't tell you is what shades of colors it goes with. Because that's the thing, if you say, "Oh yeah, this is salmon or beige or aubergine," obviously, no one who is blind is going to know what that means. You can say the words all day long, but if you have no idea, no concept of color, and if you have absolutely no idea what that would go with, and unless you wanna spend every morning Googling what colors go with what, it's just not feasible to say to a person, "Oh yeah, this is blue," or, "This is green," because there's so many different shades of green and there's probably gonna be more colors synthesized every day that look different. So in a perfect world, there would be a device that not only tells you the color and the shade of green, but also the most ideal shade that would go with it.
0:12:12.4 NG: Shelby, you'll have to forgive me 'cause I don't remember the name of this program, but I did read once that there was like a live-person option where you could basically FaceTime somebody and they would help you pick out your clothes. Do you find something like that valuable?
0:12:29.3 Shelby: I do and I don't just because obviously, I would feel uncomfortable with them seeing me in my pajamas or [chuckle] whatever, but it's not an option that I would leave out all together. If I have to use it, then I will. The problem is going to lie in, what do you do if there is no one available to take your call? That's gonna be the tricky thing. And obviously, if no one is available to take your call or your phone's not working or whatever, it's not... It's great that that's available, but it's not really going to help as far as picking out clothing if nobody's there to help.
0:13:17.2 DD: Shelby, this is Dr. Droste. You bring up some interesting points. I am not visually challenged, but I'm definitely clothes-challenged. I have a lot of trouble...
0:13:28.9 Shelby: I am definitely no fashionista.
0:13:31.1 DD: Yeah, I absolutely not in any credit, or let's just say any time I do something right, it's not because of me, it's because of my wife, right?
[laughter]
0:13:43.9 Shelby: There you go.
0:13:44.2 DD: And this is a real problem for me. I get up in the morning and it's frequently dark, so that's not the time to think about it. So for that reason, I like to wear suits more than sport coats 'cause I can never match the sport coat, the shirt and the pants ever. Never. And with the suit, at least I have the top and the bottom together, and all I have to do is make sure that the shirt doesn't clash terribly. So what all this means is, is that I'm frequently, every night before I go to bed, I pick out my clothes for the next day because I still have light, and I hang them up. And that's how I have to deal with it because if I make my decisions in the morning... The other thing is, my wife is frequently up at night and she'll say, "No, no, that didn't work," and now I have to go back to the drawing board, you know?
0:14:53.2 Shelby: Yeah.
0:14:53.8 DD: So what you're touching on affects non-visually challenged people also, maybe not to the degree you're affected, but the thing I'm trying to impart is that if you give it some consideration a day before or even two days before, and you kinda lay the clothes out and if you can get someone to look at it and say, "Oh yeah, it's okay, that's okay," then you know you're good. And it saved you a lot of mental energy in the morning when time is always precious to...
0:15:26.1 Shelby: Definitely.
0:15:27.8 DD: To go on, right?
0:15:29.5 Shelby: Definitely. I always picked out my clothes in college the night before, so that I would have them hanging up on the chair just...
0:15:36.8 DD: There you go.
0:15:37.2 Shelby: So I can pop out of bed, get my shower, and just move on.
0:15:40.7 DD: Yep, and move on. The other thing I have a problem with are socks.
0:15:45.0 Shelby: Yeah. [laughter]
0:15:45.9 DD: I've pretty much given up on that. I just about where any pair of socks I can get.
0:15:51.0 Shelby: Well, I'll actually, if you want a tip, there are actually... I don't know if you've heard of these Sock-Locks, but they are basically little square or little round plastic things. And it's really cool because you can take a pair of socks, not folded up, you'd have to unfold them, but you can take a pair of socks and you can put both of them inside of this little Sock-Lock thing, and it'll basically keep them together so that you know that you have a match.
0:16:24.0 DD: Yeah. And I did not know that.
0:16:26.0 Shelby: Mm-hmm, they're really, really [0:16:27.9] ____.
0:16:28.0 DD: I did not know that. One of the ways I've compensated for that is in the office I wear PF Flyers.
0:16:35.0 Shelby: Okay.
0:16:35.8 DD: And the PF Flyers are all different colors. I've got green and aqua and plaid and black and red. And I come in the morning and I say, "Well, which one of these am I gonna wear today?" And sometimes I'll even... Like during Christmas, I wear red and green.
0:16:52.5 Shelby: Oh, yeah.
0:16:53.2 DD: Yeah. I wear red and green and we had St Patrick's Day last week, I had all green. And when you do that, you don't have to worry too much about your socks.
0:17:01.9 Shelby: Right. [laughter]
0:17:03.2 DD: So, anyhow, it's just, these are interesting, interesting things. I have a question for you and that is, when you go out and probably to eat, is that a challenge for you?
0:17:18.1 Shelby: It can be. It really just depends on what's being served or ordered. With meat especially and things like butter and bread, obviously you would have to... I know that with tougher cuts of meat like steak, what I try to do is I will use my fork and position it against the edge of the meat, and then I'll have it so that the tongs are facing away from the... Let's see, I'm trying to explain it here. Basically, I would have the tongs facing to the left 'cause I'm right-handed, and then I have the knife in my right hand and I would position it up against the back of the fork. So I would use the fork to stab into the meat, and then I can run the knife against the back of it and just kind of saw back and forth. And it's harder to do with some cuts rather than others, but it certainly does get the job done and you can cut it as small as you need to. For the sake of ease, sometimes I will just use my fingers as a guide as well, obviously not positioning underneath the knife [chuckle] 'cause that would be disastrous. But there's more than one way to skin a cat, and that's how I typically do it.
0:18:44.1 DD: Well, that's very interesting.
0:18:46.8 Shelby: There's just so much to think about especially when you're trying to impress someone in the public. There's just so much that people don't think about, they take for granted. "Oh yeah, where did you learn to cut your meat?" "Oh, well, my mom taught me and I just learned visually." But since we don't have that option, that's obviously something that would need to be worked on. But it's just the little things, you know? [chuckle]
0:19:16.8 DD: So how long did it take you to learn that skill?
0:19:20.1 Shelby: To be honest, I'm still learning, but I've tried to practice with my mom and dad while I was at home. If we have meat, sometimes I'll sit down and I'll work on cutting the meat, that sort of thing. The general rule of thumb is, you always wanna practice this sort of thing at home before you actually do it in the public, just so that you can get the feel of what you're doing, make sure that, you're doing it in a way that's socially acceptable. And trust me, I'm not really among the social elite of society, but [laughter] I do at least know the importance of trying to make a good impression with someone. So that's just something I've had to learn as I go along.
0:20:06.1 DD: Yeah, I think it's fair to say it's something that we all have to learn as we go along. Yeah, you're definitely learning.
0:20:11.8 Shelby: Definitely. A lot of learning this stuff is trial and error too.
0:20:19.8 DD: When you go out with your parents, do they kind of coach you a little bit?
0:20:23.3 Shelby: They try to, though we try not... Like I said, we try to work on some of the skills when we're at home and then they'll coach me there. And they'll say, "You probably need to cut it a little bit smaller," or they'll try and offer alternative techniques to getting it done in a way that's easier for me. So yeah, they'll coach me along the way. You've met my parents, so I'm sure that you know I'm very fortunate to have people like them because they're just, they're so willing to help me and they try to put themselves in the same position as me. And that's the thing about teaching a blind person. If you're sighted, you're so used to doing things a certain way, and obviously, when it comes to teaching someone who doesn't have the luxury of vision, you're gonna have to do things differently and to put it into perspective.
0:21:24.1 Shelby: I remember one time when I was here at home cooking, and my mom started to teach me one of the ways that she had learned over the years. But it was just very incompatible because obviously it's not something that she would have to think about being able to see herself. So if you're going to teach a blind person, you have to become a blind person in a sense. I'm not saying go and gouge your eyes out, but obviously, you'd have to make it...
0:21:53.9 DD: You can put a blindfold. You can use a blindfold.
0:21:57.0 Shelby: Exactly. Use a blindfold. Use a pair of sleep shades. Do it as a blind person yourself before you start applying techniques that another blind person can use. You have to put yourself in the same position as that person if you wanna teach them.
0:22:14.8 S2: So how do you navigate the television then? I'm somebody who's been [0:22:19.9] ____ on that all the time.
0:22:21.8 Shelby: Honestly, I don't really watch anything on TV. [chuckle] I do watch Netflix and stuff. Most of the time I'll watch it on my computer. I also have an Apple TV. It's basically, for those of you who've never seen it, it's basically this little box and it's connected to the TV with cables, and it can basically turn... You can sign-in to it with your Apple account and it basically makes your TV accessible. There are TVs out nowadays that do have better accessibility settings. They'll have narration, you have closed captioning, magnification. And I have a feeling that a lot of that is going to get better as newer and newer models are released. So it's becoming easier to navigate the television. Actually, I didn't even know this until recently, but the remote downstairs, 'cause we actually just got a new TV, and I recently found out that there are a few buttons on the remote that are labeled with braille, and those are just the most important buttons. So you have your channel, your volume control, power buttons, that sort of thing.
0:23:37.2 Shelby: But yeah, there's definitely ways of working around it, and if you wanna channel-surf or you're new to TV for the first time, again, a lot of it's gonna be trial and error once you get it set up to figure out what each of the buttons do. Another thing that can help you too is if you don't know how a device works, go online and find the manual for the device. That's gonna be one of your starting points. If you have no idea which button does what and nothing seems to happen when you press every single button on that panel, go online and find the manual. And another thing that can be really helpful too are YouTube videos. Because chances are, if you're running into a lot of problems with using this for the first time, there's a chance that someone else has too, and they will tend to post their experiences on YouTube or other similar online platforms.
0:24:36.1 DD: We call it "YouTube University."
0:24:38.3 Shelby: There you go. [laughter] There you go.
0:24:40.8 DD: YouTube University. It's just amazing what it has done. I mean, it has applications for everything, from changing the blades on your lawnmower. The other night, my wife and I went to it to find out how to get a Fitbit Alta, which I've had sitting in my door for about three years. And it didn't come with a manual, it just said go to set up on Fitbit. And it didn't have anything for my Fitbit because it was too old. And not only that, the battery wouldn't take a charge. So it has never been used but it kind of expires. And so we used YouTube University and it said that if the battery doesn't charge in two hours, then it's probably defective and it won't hold the charge. And they were totally right.
0:25:41.1 Shelby: Yeah, that's definitely helpful. I remember one night I was just bored and I was lying in bed and I couldn't sleep, and I happened to see an article on how to change a tire, so I just did it. [laughter]
0:25:52.2 DD: There you go. Wow. I wouldn't even wanna think about trying that.
0:25:58.3 Shelby: [laughter] I was just bored and I wanted something to read, so I read that. Still, you never know when you're gonna be able to use skills that you pick up, even just in [0:26:09.0] ____. I mean, that's kind of how I got started in taking courses in basic anatomy and medical terminology.
0:26:17.2 DD: When you did your anatomy lab, you used your fingers?
0:26:20.7 Shelby: Well, I would, but unfortunately this course is being done online. And now, when I was in science class, I did have... One of the things that they did bring in was a 3D anatomically correct model of a human being. And that proved to be a very invaluable tool. And it was really interesting to see what each of the body parts looked like and that sort of thing. It was very, very interesting. I really, I wish I still had it, actually.
0:26:49.3 DD: I'm astounded you're able to learn that. Anatomy was one of the hardest things to...
0:26:52.9 Shelby: It's pretty easy to get the terminology.
0:26:55.0 DD: That we had in medical school, and you would just get so glazed over reading the textbooks. And if it wasn't for the anatomy lab where we actually had to dissect the muscles and the nerves and things and then run your fingers on it, I don't think I ever, ever would've passed.
0:27:14.9 Shelby: I have to say, one of the things that I could never really... I would feel so uncomfortable doing this, is to dissect an eye, not out of lack of fascination, but just the fact that I'm cutting into an organ that does not work or has been taken from someone. I don't know how I would feel about that. But it's not due to any lack of fascination, 'cause I read about the eye all the time and how it works.
0:27:44.9 DD: Well, we did pig eyes, cow eyes. I don't think I've ever dissected a human eye ever. But pig eyes, cow eyes, I've done quite a few. That's how I learned surgery, I was using pig eye.
0:27:56.8 Shelby: Yeah, I sort of just watched when everybody else dissected eyeballs. I just, I'm kind of glad I couldn't see it actually, but I also felt conflicted about it. But I would love to. I think in another life I could probably be a doctor or in the military or something like that, but not in this lifetime. [chuckle]
0:28:22.9 DD: Well, a few years ago at one of our sports days, we had a blind physician come and speak to everybody. Now, her blindness was gradual. She didn't have it her entire life, but by the time she got to higher education, she was very visually impaired. And I think she had one of the hereditary retinal diseases that the Pediatric Retinal Research Foundation is trying to find cures for. But she had to use all these techniques that you're describing to read patient charts and to prepare for her patient load that day, and it was very fascinating to hear how she prepared. I can honestly say that from my perspective, now that we're in the computer period, I have to spend a lot more time preparing for my day than at home than I ever did before because we don't have paper charts so we can hold our hand and leaf through. And it's very uncomfortable for me to go into a room and pretend I'm talking or examining a patient and have my face in the computer.
0:29:40.5 Shelby: Right.
0:29:40.9 DD: So I put my face in the computer the night before, and then I write down on a cheat sheet all of the important things and what we're gonna try and do the next day, what's the plan. And...
0:29:54.4 Shelby: Yeah, that's a good idea.
0:29:57.3 DD: I never had to do that before, but this is better 'cause they get all FaceTime, it's all face to face. I got a little thing that I'll look down and read to kind of remind me, keep me on track. But I spend an average one and a half hours every night before the next day and getting prepared for the patients.
0:30:19.2 Shelby: Yeah, you'd almost have to, if you were blind, you would always have to have a braille display in order to keep up with that especially if you're on an emergency scenario. 'Cause a lot of the time, if you're in an emergency setting, a lot of those vitals have to be seen in real time and they change so quickly. So you would almost have to have a braille display in order to keep up with it and have it connected to the bio monitors just to see everything that was going on in real time.
0:30:47.8 S2: Hey, Shelby.
0:30:48.8 Shelby: If you think about it, it's very easy to memorize the ranges of vitals where things are supposed to be. Obviously, for a waking heart rate, it would be anywhere between 80 and 100 beats per minute. So if anything above or below that might cause concern. And then obviously blood pressure is supposed to be 120 over 80 is the average. So it's easy once you figure out the ranges of those vitals, I guess. Then again, I've never been a doctor, so. [laughter]
0:31:18.9 DD: Do you use a Fitbit or something like that, that can now give you those things?
[music]
0:31:24.3 Shelby: I do use my... I use my Apple Watch for tracking things like EKGs, heart rate, temperature, blood pressure, that sort of thing. Unfortunately, I don't think it has a temperature sensor yet. I'm pretty sure that's in the works [laughter] just based on everything that's coming out with Apple.
0:31:43.9 DD: Well, we would certainly like to thank you for your time tonight and we always learn from listening to you.
0:31:50.2 Shelby: Definitely learned a lot from y'all too.
0:31:52.9 DD: That's the idea. That's the idea. The podcast is called Through Our Eyes. Make sure to like and follow our Discord channel, Facebook, Instagram, and TikTok, and let us know whether you have any questions or have a topic you would like us to cover. We have tremendous things planned, and we hope you tune in again for our next podcast. This is Dr. Droste, saying goodnight to all of you, on behalf of our staff, the PRRF, thank you.
[music]
Show Notes:
Shelby talks about wanting an Orcam to help with choosing clothing in the morning.